Yesterday I met a friend in town who asked why haven’t I written any new posts lately. He is a keen reader of them and would like to read some more. I said that the latest two had been such heavy postings that it has taken some time to live them and to experience them fully. After it is done I can write some more, I promised to him. And this morning when I woke up I knew I had something important to write about. Read the rest of this entry »

Just a week ago I was on the brink of death. I went out to the beautiful forests around our house to clear the heavy thoughts of death and destruction hanging in my mind. But instead of getting cleared as usual those thoughts became only worse; for the first time ever my beloved forest became a dark dungeon alluring me with death. My life’s work had come to nothing, my writing had hardly touched anybody and my dream of fully shared love had just about vanished from my marriage. I was finished. I could just fall down and die, find my peace lying on the mosses of this great forest. Life was just too much for me… Read the rest of this entry »

These past days a Finnish word ”sovitusuhri” has popped up in my mind. It has insistently tried to tell me something, something immensely important, I have felt. I tried to find the English translation of the word, but could not google it the normal way. In Finnish ”uhri” is sacrifice and ”sovitus” is atonement! This I found out just now when I looked up the word! Etymologically atonement comes from at-one-ment, to be one with something. What could that One be? Read the rest of this entry »